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Posts Tagged ‘Superbowl’

Bruce Springsteen and the Cult Of Audio Idiocy

Posted by Bob Kohm on February 2, 2009

Some people have no capacity for sheer enjoyment.

After Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band’s performance at the Super Bowl last night, I was confronted with one of my least favorite types of music snobs– the one who can’t simply enjoy the music but has to crap all over it out of a sense of superiority. A friend of a friend posted to Facebook that Springsteen once again proved how “awful” he was and opined that everybody who enjoyed him was a “moron”.

Now let’s be honest– I couldn’t care any less for the musical taste of some random bozo with access to Facebook; it’s a free country and you can listen to whatever you want. Finding out that said bozo was the progeny of a Daddy who had an extensive music collection and thus felt he was entitled to pass judgement on the musical taste of others– now that was annoying in the same way that the Holiday Inn Express genius commercials are annoying.

Toss the name Bruce Springsteen out amongst the musically pretentious and you are bound to hit three of these dopes– people who despise whatever is popular by virtue of its popularity. According to these dilettantes, if the unwashed masses find something enjoyable then it can enjoy no merit of its own– if the musical swine like it, it must be slop. These twits always seem to forget that it is swine who also find truffles.

Whether it is Springsteen or the Beatles or the White Stripes, there is always some fatal flaw that these fools must imagine, some obscure band that they and 17 other brother schmucks have heard of from a website that went down for good three days ago that does it far better or from whom the star act stole their material. I imagine it makes them feel good, feel somehow superior to eschew the band or singer that world has recognized as great and instead revere three meth addicts from Tacoma who couldn’t buy a pack of Twinkies with their career earnings- which of course makes them so much the greater as they haven’t sold out, man.

Here’s reality, Facebook Boy– there are so many great acts out there that nobody has ever heard of that you can stop pretending that you’ve uncovered the greatest band of all time but that you’re the only one who can recognize them due to the anarcho-fascist music industry holding down the talent. It doesn’t make you intelligent or make you seem to have fantastic taste– it makes you an overinflated gasbag in need of catastrophic deflation, preferably with a Slayer keyring.

People love Bruce Springsteen– did you see how the stadium reacted to the man last night? That’s because people love his music. Unless you’re endeavoring to mathematically analyze music and identify the track that adheres most seamlessly to the divine ratio, then please shut the hell up and stop telling us that we’re all wrong and you’re the only possible arbiter of musical taste. It’s music– if it is loved, it is doing exactly what music or any artform is supposed to do. It’s eliciting a reaction.

You, on the other hand, are inducing nausea. I’ll try not to throw up all over your father’s record collection while remembering for the hundreth time that proximity to people with taste is no indication of someone actually having any.


Posted in Cultural Phenomena, Events, Jerks, Music | Tagged: , , , | 7 Comments »

PETA Goes Viral, STD-Style

Posted by Bob Kohm on January 29, 2009

Oh for the love of…

It never fails to amaze me when some hoary old media plan “gets it” and uses our collective stupidity against us to make their add all the buzz on the tubes. Every year at just about this time the world comes down with a nasty case of air-transmissable advertising plague featuring symptoms such as scantily clad women, FCC toe curling suggestivity, and the worst symptom of all– a desire to be run during the Superbowl.

This year’s “ban me” candidate is PETA’s “Screw Me With A Broccoli” campaign. In the flagship ad, recently rejected by NBC for Superbowl airing, a cavalcade of lingerie clad women cavort with asparagus and go down on pumpkins before one very brief shot of a totally nude woman apparently enjoying the nubbly end of a broccoli on bits of her anatomy where nubbly bits of broccoli apparently feel rather good.

So just as has used fake ads designed to be rejected by the Superbowl network to generate publicity, so too does PETA. And people still fall for this.

And here I am writing about it. I think Socrates said it best when he said, “Gack”.

Now, just for my friend ITC, here is your much asked for link to scantily clad women…

Posted in Jerks, Just Annoying | Tagged: , , , | 3 Comments »

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